Bad Mommy!

May 26, 2008 by Kailani  
Filed under my family

I meant to write this a while ago but just couldn’t find the time. Anyway . . .

A while ago my sister and I went to see Made of Honor. I was so excited because I haven’t seen a grown-up movie in a theater in such a long time! Little did I know that going to the movies isn’t as easy as it used to be.

First, I went online to find out what time the movie started only to find out when we got there that the online listing was wrong. For us, it wasn’t too bad, just 50 minutes off. However, there was another family there who thought their movie started at 10:45am only to find it starts at 12:00noon. They were so mad!

When we finally got into the theater, they played about 20 minutes of commercials followed by another 20 minutes of upcoming attractions. When did they start to do this? I was tired before the movie even began!

Then FINALLY, the opening credits appeared. Of course, at that exact moment my cell phones starts to vibrate. When I looked at the caller ID, I wanted to scream. It was Girlie Girl’s school. Are you kidding me? I walked outside the theater and answered the phone. Apparently, Girlie Girl and a friend of hers were in the Health Room complaining of a sore stomach. There was no fever, no throwing up, and it seemed a little fishy that both girls were there with the same symptoms. I thought for a moment and told the nurse to let her rest for a little while then send her back to class. If she was still feeling ill, she could call me and I would come and get her.

Walking back to the theater, I felt like a terrible Mom. I know that if I were at home, I probably would have gone to pick her up. I tried to convince myself that the decision was made so I should just try and enjoy the movie. But somewhere in the back of my mind I felt guilty. However, I would have also felt bad for making my sister leave with me since she picked me up even though I knew she wouldn’t mind.

Anyway, in the end everything turned out fine. I went to pick her up as soon as the movie was over and she was feeling fine. The movie was pretty good but not something I would pay to see again. It was like My Best Friend’s Wedding but with Patrick Dempsey instead of Julia Roberts. Still, very enjoyable.

So, would you have left the theater to pick up your child? You would, huh? It’s okay, you can tell me.

**BTW, when you get a chance please stop by An Island Review for my latest product review on Maiden America. Mahalo to the Parent Bloggers Network for this great review opportunity!**

Spotlight Comment from Desert Songbird of The Ice Box: Yup, go with your instinct. That doesn’t mean we don’t feel guilt when we make decisions like this, but I think as mothers, we have pretty good instincts when it comes to stuff like this.

About the author:
Kailani is the owner and founder of An Island Life. You'll find her sharing her daily life as a mother to 3 wonderful daughters, working as a flight attendant, and living a blessed life in Hawaii.


24 Responses to “Bad Mommy!”
  1. Jill says:

    If I thought he was faking, I would have done the same thing that you did.

    Jill’s last blog post..Finally, Some Clarity

  2. Write From Karen says:

    Given the circumstances: she wasn’t throwing up, she didn’t have a fever AND she was there with a buddy (how likely is it that both girls were sick at the exact same time? I mean, it happens, but not likely), I would have done the same thing.

    My boys have learned, early on, they MUST go to school even if they have to crawl to get there. (Okay, that’s a slight exaggeration – If they are running fevers and have outward appearances of being sick, that’s one thing), But a few aches and pains? Welcome to the real world, boys.

    Harsh? Perhaps. But what are we teaching them if we allow them to stay home because they feel “icky.” Feeling under the weather somedays is just how it is – we all feel poopy somedays – you deal with it and move on.

    Write From Karen’s last blog post..Monday Morning Meme – May 26th

  3. witchypoo says:

    I averted many a case of schoolitis by enforcing the bed rest rule if my child was too sick to attend school. If he came home from school, his job was to get well. In bed.
    Whenever he said he was sick, I took him at his word, because he didn’t want to spend the day in bed.

    witchypoo’s last blog post..Giveaway Winner

  4. Mel says:

    Nope, I wouldn’t have. I am actually surprised the nurse called you considering she didn’t have a fever or was vomitting. Our nurse is a stickler for keeping them in school. I agree with you that it is a bit fishy that she was with her friend. I wanted to see that movie too, but thought it looked like it would probably be just one of those no-brainer movies.

    Mel’s last blog post..Goals and Saturday Plans

  5. Tracey says:

    You trusted your gut instinct and you were right.
    There is nothing wrong with that, and part of being a GOOD mom is knowing when you need to take time for yourself.

    I would have done the same thing if I were in your shoes!

  6. Alicia @ Experiencing Each Moment says:

    I would have done exactly what you did, and I think it was the right thing, not just convenience. The movie just gave you a reason to do the right thing!

    Alicia @ Experiencing Each Moment’s last blog post..Great Strides: Team Sam!!!

  7. Desert Songbird says:

    Yup, go with your instinct. That doesn’t mean we don’t feel guilt when we make decisions like this, but I think as mothers, we have pretty good instincts when it comes to stuff like this.

    Desert Songbird’s last blog post..Manic Monday – Star

  8. Cathi says:

    It would have totally depended on the situation. You made the same decision I would have made. You know your child better than anyone and many times if there isn’t a fever and the child wasn’t ill that morning the school won’t even phone the parent. When I was the Health Clerk I knew the students well enough to know if their complaints were legitimate. I promise you, more parents than not would have made the decision you did. Feel good about yourself and the time spent with your sister!!

    Cathi’s last blog post..Photo Hunt – Shoes

  9. Melanie says:

    Hi, just recently found your blog and wanted to tell I really enjoy visiting and reading all your posts.

    Regarding this post in particular, if I thought my child was faking it, I would have left him a bit longer and finished the movie, too.

    Have a great week!

    Melanie’s last blog post..1 John 2:25-29

  10. Krista says:

    I think you did the right thing. Maybe this happened when you were “busy” so she could learn that she doesn’t just get to come home from school for thinking she’s sick. I’m sorry it made you feel guilty.

    Krista’s last blog post..Something for Them

  11. Kim says:

    As a teacher, granted of 10 year-olds, I would rather kids stay at school and in my room unless they have a fever or are truly in pain, not just passing discomfort.

    Also, I believe kiddos need to learn how to comfort themselves if they are not sick but just not feeling well.

    I’m not a mom, but as a teacher, I think you did the right thing.

  12. Pamela says:

    You have to trust your instincts.
    Yours were correct.

    and yes.. we never get there early — which you can do in a small town. Come in quietly during the pre movie junk … o

    Pamela’s last blog post..Repeat of Last Years Memorial Day Tribute

  13. Kelly @ Love Well says:

    If I had a gut feeling that she wasn’t really sick, I wouldn’t have worried about it. I would have stayed for the movie. (And if I were home, I wouldn’t have gone to the school, either.)

    I think you made the right call, given the circumstances. I’m sure you would have gone if the nurse had said, “She’s throwing up, she has a fever, she wants her mommy.” But that wasn’t the case.

    Kelly @ Love Well’s last blog post..Stormy Dinner

  14. Renee says:

    well for me his is totally hypothetical, but I would have done the same thing. The situation sounded too fishy to take it seriously.

    No need for you to feel guilty at all. I’m suprised that the nurse even bothered to call you. Unfortunately she has just taught your daughter that she can get out of class by claiming a tummy ache. grrr

    wonder what she was trying to get out of?

    and I agree with the comment who said if you’re too sick for school you have to stay in bed. You’ll have a lot less faking if being sick is no fun.

    I NEVER got to stay home from school as a kid. the one and only time I was sick enough to stay home it was the weekend and I was well by Monday. :sigh:

    Renee’s last blog post..Subway contest Not for Homeschoolers!!!

  15. wornoutwoman says:

    I am looking forward to seeing the movie, but with my schedule I’m sure I’ll end up seeing on it on DVD. After reading your review, I might be best to wait.

    PS you’re not a bad mom. Every mom needs to catch a break and some quality time for herself, to make sure she can be at the top of her game with the kiddo’s.
    Kim aka wornoutwoman from Cre8buzz

    wornoutwoman’s last blog post..Feelin’ good

  16. Dee says:

    Your fine, I think had the nurse told you that GG was with a fever etc. you would have left the theatre, but this way it gave GG some time to figure out if she was really sick, or just tired or something else?

    Dee’s last blog post..May Day is Lei Day in Hawaii

  17. catnip says:

    I would have done the same thing! You had a feeling something was fishy and your instinct was right on.

    Btw – cute blog!

    catnip’s last blog post..trees blooming everywhere

  18. Jen says:

    I agree with most of the above. If you felt that she was faking, I would have not gone right away. Obviously if she got worse, the school would call you back. I’m a huge believer in making my daughter stick with something unless she absolutely cannot. It teaches her self-discipline, commitment, etc. I think you did the right thing, but I would have probably felt guilty too and not enjoyed my time as much as I could have! The mommy-guilt is always there! :-D

    Jen’s last blog post..Memorial Day Weekend ?08

  19. Lori says:

    I dd the same thing to my daughter a couple of weeks ago-except I was just at home. I felt strange about making her stay, but she is so dramatic about little things sometimes. She had a stomach virus last summer, (at Family Camp, thank you) so she knows what it feels like to be ready to hurl. She told me she could go to lunch-which makes me want to hurl on a good day at the school cafeteria-so I figured she was fine-turned out ok. She came home happy (whew!).

  20. Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says:

    I agree too – there wasn’t anything obviously wrong with her, so I think you made the right decision. It’s one thing if they’re running a fever, throwing up, etc., but I know that my kids complain of stomachaches or headaches all the time and 99.9% of the time it’s absolutely nothing to worry about.

    Good for you for doing something for yourself! :)

    I was wondering how the movie compared to My Best Friend’s Wedding – it seemed like the same concept, just with a guy instead of a girl…

    Deb – Mom of 3 Girls’s last blog post..Hey, look!

  21. AreWeThereYetMom says:

    As many times as I’ve been down to the school nurses for Josh’s diabetes, I agree with DS, you have your insticts to go on. If she didn’t have a fever, and hadn’t thrown up, a little rest is all she needed.

    I felt really bad the other day too. Because of the weird weather we had, it was the last day of school, and Josh wasn’t feeling too well. I didn’t want him to miss the last day of school, so I told him to rest a little at the nurses, and if he didn’t feel better I would come and get him. He rested half an hour and was fine the rest of the day.

    It did sound a little suspicious that GG was sick with her friend.

    Glad that GG got to feeling better, and you and your sister could enjoy the movie.

    AreWeThereYetMom’s last blog post..May’s Excellent Photographer Photo Contest~Color My World

  22. Melissa says:

    I probably would have done the same thing. I’m pretty strict with the sick stuff… if you’re sick enough to stay home, then you should be in bed all day. Not up playing games or outside… I don’t let them watch movies unless I KNOW they are really sick. Otherwise they stay in bed and read. The end. My oldest doesn’t “fake” very often… and when he tries, and I remind him of how his day will be spent, he usually has a miraculous recovery!

  23. HawaiiVacationGifts says:

    I don’t think you were a bad mommy at all. She was at the health room being looked after, and you went and got her right after the movie. Your instincts were right.

  24. Lulu says:

    When I saw the previews, I totally thought that the movie looked like a backwards My Best Friend’s Wedding. Glad that you validated that for me. And as for letting Girlie Girl stay at school? I probably would have done the same thing…

    Lulu’s last blog post..Nature vs. Nurture

We Appreciate Your Comments

Thank you for stopping by!
If you'd like an image next to your comment, you need a gravatar.

CommentLuv Enabled