Three Weeks and Counting . . .

May 24, 2009 by Kailani  
Filed under family topics, main blog, my family

I can’t believe that Baby Bug will be starting preschool in about 3 weeks. Where did the time go? The only problem is that she needs to be potty trained before she starts and she’s nowhere close to it. I’m at my wits end.

Our local newspaper recently printed an article with suggestions on the best way to get your child potty trained quickly. Some of the tips I’ve heard of before like:

  • Stop talking to your child about using the potty
  • Get rid of the diapers
  • Don’t stay in the bathroom with your child

However, he did make one suggestion that I was kind of bothered by. He recommended that right after your child eats a high fiber breakfast, gate him in the bathroom naked from the waist down and don’t let him out until he poops in the potty no matter how long it takes. He even says not to reward or even praise your child for being successful.

I’ve never been a big believer in tough love especially when it comes to potty training. I believe it will happen when the time is right. After all, she’s not going to be 5 years old and still wearing diapers . . . I hope. I guess I was just hoping that it would be as easy as it was with Girlie Girl. She practically trained herself!

Anyway, I have three weeks to do this so wish me luck! What worked for you?

About the author:
Kailani is the owner and founder of An Island Life. You'll find her sharing her daily life as a mother to 3 wonderful daughters, working as a flight attendant, and living a blessed life in Hawaii. She is also the founder of the group review site - Family Review Network. Follow along on her adventure of a lifetime this Winter as a member of the Vaseline Dry Skin Patrol!
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Comments

28 Responses to “Three Weeks and Counting . . .”
  1. Grace @ Sandier Pastures says:

    When we were potty training, we woke up an hour earlier than usual every morning and after breakfast, me or my husband would accompany our daughter to the bathroom and wait until ‘it’ comes. Sometimes it takes a loong time but we do different things at the toilet like, reading books, singing song, rubbing tummy…until it became a normal routine. When she was 18 months, she was potty trained already, both for pee and poo.

    I hope you find something that works for you!

  2. Melissa says:

    We did not try to train our son until he was about 2 1/2 . The preschool he went to placed him in a class where they potty train (just had more people in the class room incase of accidents) BUT the way they suggested we train (At school and at home) was to just take the diapers away… It worked! My son had a few accidents and after 1 week he was going to the potty on his own. I think it helped that he was in a classroom with a bunch of other little ones also going to the potty. I was so impressed! For my older son.. he wasn’t fully trained until he was almost 4. (drove me batty!)
    Anyway.. good luck!

  3. Sweet Serendipity says:

    My kids went on the potty at around 18 months. They did it a few times, relished in their new accomplishment and then promptly lost interest. My oldest was the toughest…he was almost 3 1/2 and only started using the potty consistently when I sent him off to preschool in under pants with a warning that the teacher would not change him and he HAD to use the potty like all the other kids. He never had an accident. Of course I wouldn’t have done that if I had not know he was perfectly capable of using the potty and had bladder control, etc. And it was a 3 hour preschool two days a week. Still, the influence from the other kids sure helped.

    My daughter was easier and started using the potty regularly by 3 years old. Once a friend convinced me to 86 the pulls ups for good, she had very few accidents.
    Good luck! Patience is key :D

  4. Qtpies7 says:

    I’ve had way more experience than I care to admit, lol. But it is different for EVERY child. I do believe in not pushing too much, for sure, however after 2 1/2 they CAN do it and you can make them. I let a child go because they didn’t seem “ready” and he was nearly 4 and still not at all interested. I finally got fed up and told him I was going to spank him if he didn’t use the potty. It took ONCE and he was fully trained, never an accident. He knew, he just didn’t want to be inconvenienced.

    I am almost done potty training my 2 1/2 year old!!!! After Sam woke up with a dry diaper one morning I knew he would need to pee, so I locked us in the bathroom and told him we were not going out until he peed IN the potty. It took 30 minutes, and a couple of tantrums, but it happened! And then I backed off. A month later he was ready to start on it. I should have done that every morning, though. He would have gotten it after the first morning and it would have gotten smoother and smoother.
    I totally disagree with the not giving praise. That is harsh. We have a potty dance and a poopy dance! Sam got over them fast, so it is a short lived time of encouragement, but they need it.

  5. Summer says:

    Well I have no advice to give you as I waited until the boys were both beyond ready (3 1/2 yrs.) and it happened overnight. All I can say is good luck!

  6. Janet Carpenter says:

    My little girl is 3 1/2 and still in diapers, we’ve tried stickers, prizes, celebrating. If I tell her she can’t go on the potty, she will go one time but then back to diapers. So I am definitely NOT the person to give advice! But I will say good luck and let me know what works when you are successful :)

    I agree with you that potty training is not the appropriate time to use tough love. I don’t want to traumatize her about using the bathroom! Of course, then again, I’m haven’t been successful, either….

  7. Renee says:

    Here’s what we used http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T106600.asp

    you can do a potty training boot camp where you hang out outside all day for an intense potty training session. I didn’t have that option due to cold, but in Hawaii you should be able to do that no problems.

  8. Just Mom says:

    It will happen when she’s ready. It might not be on your schedule, though, so be prepared.

    If it makes you feel any better, my son wasn’t completely potty trained until he was five, but he could have been trained earlier (as I learned the hard way).

    He “trained” himself once I finally stopped talking about the potty. It was totally a control issue for him — and me. I laugh now when I think about how he probably would have been trained at an earlier age had I just relaxed about the whole thing and not tried to force him to follow my timing schedule.

  9. Cathi says:

    My comment might be a bit discouraging but I’ve learned that it near impossible until the child is ready, wants it and then voila!

  10. Annie says:

    Every kids is different and you know your daughter and what motivates her. My son poos about noon every day. If we locked him in every morning, we would have TONS of problems. Hopefully you can find what works for your daughter.

    We put a trainer toilet in our bathroom when our son was 18 months old. The Boy would ask about it and sit on it fully clothed occasionally. Then, he lost all interest at 24 months. At 26 months he told us he had to go pee and he did! It was awesome. The undies with charters have helped a ton. The Boy peed once in them and we made him wear a diaper the rest of the day. We told him if he kept the diaper dry he could have his big boys back. That was a long day for both of us but got the point across. He has been day trained for the last 7 months with about 4 accidents.

    Good Luck!

  11. Hillary says:

    I’m just getting ready to potty train my second one, too. Fun times!

    When we potty trained our older daughter, we set out her child potty on our kitchen floor and let her “play” with it for the first two days. After that, I would sit her on it, in our kitchen, every half hour. Eventually, she’d do something in it, and she’d get so excited! After a few days of this, we moved her potty into the bathroom. We started asking her, often, if she had to go potty, but we still sat her on it every hour or so, just in case.

    When she would finally do something in the potty, we rewarded her with just a few Skittles.

    We took it very slowly: we didn’t actually admit she was fully potty trained until two or three months later. She was fully trained, but we were still super cautious.

    We used pull-ups while training, and had no problems. We just told her they were special underwear-diapers, and she understood. We also bought her special, pretty underwear and explained she could wear them when she didn’t pee in her diaper anymore. That was a huge motivator! She really didn’t want to get her pretty underwear wet, and when she did, she was upset about it.

    Another thing we did in the beginning, since it was summer at the time, was let her run around naked from the waist down in our fenced backyard. She was shocked the first couple of time she accidentally peed on herself, but it helped her realize what her body was telling her. It didn’t happen very often, after that. Eventually, she began to tell us she had to go. She didn’t always make it all the way to potty in time, but at least she was telling us.

    Good luck!

  12. Charlotte (Life's a Charm) says:

    i’m potty training my 2-1/2 toddler. for us, encouragement and praises help a lot. it became a better experience for us, if we clap our hands in applause and if i tell him ‘he’s a good boy’ after he potties.

  13. Sues2u2 says:

    I’m a firm believer in the praise thing. I never got mad @ my children for accidents either. That said son & daughter were totally different to train. I didn’t train son so much as let him watch Daddy. Not much help there.

    Daughter we let go naked from the waist down. She cried the one time that she wet herself & after that she ran to the potty. Also we did a reward for poops. After 10 times on the potty she got some type of reward that was agreed upon in advance. But, she was not night time trained for almost 2 1/2 yrs! I wasn’t too upset since she had never had a dry night diaper. Once she got that though it was great. Good luck.

  14. sagemom says:

    I think DH read the same article–he was telling me about that…

    DS1 is still going through potty training, we’ve been training him for a while now but since he has a speech delay it’s taking a lot longer than expected, but it’s coming along slowly but surely…

    Good luck!

  15. VeRonda says:

    Congrats to the little one… believe it or not, I remember preschool, the teacher in particular.

    Much success with the training…

  16. Traci Phillips says:

    i had one very stubborn one and my mother said the same thing……….never seen a kid come to kindergarten with diapers……lol! it WILL happen. be patient, don’t try to force it, she will do it!

  17. Melissa says:

    My oldest was easy. We made a sticker chart for him. The first chart had one square on it. So, the first time he went potty he got a sticker and also a reward for filling up the chart. The next chart had 3 squares on it and then next had 5, then 10 and so on. Every time he filled up a chart he got some kind of reward. With my middle and youngest two the charts did not work. They just didn’t care enough about the toys or treats. We would sit in there for 15-20 minutes at a time. Then 15-20 minutes off, then back on till they went. But, I didn’t just dump them in the bathroom and leave them. I sat in there with them and we sang songs, read stories, blew bubbles… and then there was a lot of praise when the deed was done. Good luck!

  18. Lissete says:

    My 1st daughter was potty trained at a lttle over 2. My 2nd at a 22 months! I guess from watching her sister?
    In both cases, I had them run aound the house naked. I guess it helped that I was a stay at home mom (and we had tile floors!). The 1st day they peed all over the place. The 2nd day, a few accidents. By the 3rd day, they both made it to the bathroom 100% of the time. They hated having pee run down their legs :) Poop was easy to catch them before they did it brcause they would stop whatever they were doing and get “the look!” LOL

    Night time is a totally different story!

  19. Carol Olsen says:

    While it was a million years ago (or it just seems like it) when we potty trained our children, we’re helping our daughter raise her sons and our oldest grandson just turned 3 in February. He has absolutely no interest in pottying yet! My daughter is getting worried and I tell her not to push the issue and he’ll figure it out when he decides he’s ready! Wishing you luck!!

  20. Krista says:

    Ha! Let me know what works so I can try it! My son is only just 2, but I get funny looks that he’s still in diapers considering he’s so big for his age!

  21. Amanda says:

    I wish I had tips and tricks, but I don’t. I was a potty training failure with my oldest. We hit standoff mode, and he just did it when he was darn good and ready. I’m hoping it’ll be easier the 2nd time around. Good Luck!

  22. Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says:

    We’ve had it easy and difficult with potty training… Both Abby and Becca basically trained themselves, but Hannah was a nightmare. She went to preschool not completely trained – I was panicked every single time about whether she would be able to stay dry or not. She did pretty well – Ron took her potty right when they got there and she was able to get through the 2-1/2 hours just fine in most cases. They usually expect some accidents, especially with 3-year-olds. It took until Hannah was 5 though before she was dry every single day on a consistent basis!

    I don’t believe in ‘tough love’ with potty training either – she’ll get it when she’s ready. Good luck! :)

  23. JHS says:

    It was many years ago now (my boys are 22 and 17 1/2) but my recollection is that peer pressure is the best. With both boys, they wanted to use the potty when they saw others doing it. In the case of the youngest, I had the oldest take him along when he went to the bathroom &, naturally, anything big brother did, he wanted to emulate. I also sent both of them with their father when he used the facilities. I am a firm believer in potty training only being effective when the child is both physically and mentally ready.

    I have NEVER heard of locking a kid in the bathroom until he/she goes & never would do such a thing. Frankly, that sounds abusive. And counter-productive. If using the toilet becomes associated with punishment, unhappiness, fear of reprisal, etc., it seems that the child will be set up for long-term problems.

    I used rewards and tried to make it fun. We read books about it (there was a book about a little bear but can’t remember the name of it), aimed for the Cheerios (you can do that with boys), bragged to Grandmas about success (and they made a big deal out of it), etc. For the oldest, I promised “Big Boy pants” — Spiderman and Batman underwear — with success. And I fondly recall taking him shopping at Mervyn’s with my parents to buy them. When he got there, he saw the plain white kind and decided that he wanted “Papa pants” because they looked like the kind my father wore — yes, Papa had been helping by taking him to the bathroom with him, too.

    Thanks for affording me this trip down memory lane. :-) I just said “good night” to my oldest and looking at him with 3 days or so of stubble on his face makes it hard to believe that I am sitting here typing on this topic about the same kid!! I feel old!

    Best of luck!

  24. Audrey says:

    Wow, that actually sounds like borderline abuse to make a child use the toilet or be locked in a bathroom.

    Not all kids are ready at the same time. Both of my girls taught themselves. Truly they were trained over night. I don’t recall any accidents as their bodies were ready.

  25. Sarah says:

    I’m not buying the tough love idea, just seems cruel to me. My son turned 3 in February. We tried everything we could think of, all kinds of bribes, you name it. He was at the point where he knew what we wanted him to do. He’d say he was going to do it, even sit on the potty for a while, then say he didn’t need to go and as soon as you let him go he’d go in his diaper within a few minutes.

    I finally got fed up last Monday, stuck him in underwear and told him the diapers were all gone. The first day was brutal, accidents galore, but he did use the potty once. The second day was a little better, the third even better. By Thursday he was on board, telling me whenever he needed to go. It has now been one full week completely accident free. He’s even been dry overnight, we stopped putting diapers on after the third night when he said he didn’t want one and promised not to wet the bed.

    So that’s what worked for us.

    Good luck!

  26. Mandee says:

    Wow that sounds kinda harsh! My daughter was easy and trained within a week. For the first couple days we just used pull-ups and she got a hershey kiss everytime she went in the potty…..if she pooped in the potty she got two. She stopped asking for the candy before the week was over and she was trained :) Every child is so different for sure, hopefully my son will be as easy as her when the time comes. Good luck!

  27. stampedwithgrace says:

    my last 4 children all potty trained quickly with this method:
    I picked a week that I would be home most of the time. I put them in a big shirt with no bottoms, and I put the putty chair in the front bathroom (close to where we would be most of the day). they did not potty on themselves and within a week were potty trained. when we went to church, I put a pull-up on them and told them they were “church panties” and that we don’t pee in them. they also got an M&M if they went in the potty.

  28. potty training says:

    All my children where potty trained within a week! It takes 100% dedication and you absolutely MUST stay consistent and positive. The parents I see who have the hardest time are all over the place with the methods they use.

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