Do You Lurk?

February 21, 2008 by Kailani  
Filed under blogging

I’m not much of a lurker – pretty much every blog I’ve ever visited I’ve commented on at some point. Even if it’s to say, “Hey, good point!”

However, there is this one particular blog that I’ve read occasionally for the last year and have still to contribute anything to the conversation. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because he has such a loyal following of massive amounts that I figure I would just get lost in the crowd. Maybe it’s because they all seem to know each other so well and I’d feel like the new kid in school not wanting to say anything to make me stand out. Maybe I feel that I don’t have anything intelligent to contribute. Maybe after all this time I feel a little silly coming out – so to speak.

In any case, that made me wonder if other bloggers felt the same way. My little blog is in no way on the same level as his but I feel like the people who visit on occasion have become really good friends with me and amongst each other. I hope that everyone who stops by feels free to say (or not say) whatever they want without fear of being judged. Comment or lurk – either way is fine. However, I hope eventually all lurkers will feel comfortable enough to say “Hi!”.

What about you? Do you lurk on other blogs? If so, why?

Spotlight Comment from Dee of Drama Mama:

I’ve never considered myself a lurker, it sounds so beneath me! hehehehehehe! I like to consider myself a window shopper….lol Okay I’ll cut the crap ….I LURK….

About the author:
Owner and founder of An Island Life. Sharing my life as a mother to 3 wonderful daughters, working as a flight attendant, and living a blessed life in Hawaii.


69 Responses to “Do You Lurk?”
  1. yoshi says:

    I think everyone lurks on blogs. A lot of people don’t want to say anything with fears of being flamed or something.

    But I say who cares, just say what you think. I think I would just appreciate any comment even if it is to say “hai!”

    so comment away I say.

    yoshi’s last blog post..Warning: This post may affect your health

  2. Jessica says:

    i feel exactly ALL of those ways on some blogs – including yours at first. when someone already has 20+ responses, it just feels like probably don’t need / care what i’ve got to say. i DO know i love to get comments, (the few that i do get!) and i know there are lurkers that don’t comment on my blog.
    you seem like such a sweet person, i just liked you immediately. so i overcame my ‘fears’ and started commenting.

    Jessica’s last blog post..tft: dreams, aspirations, and all that jazz

  3. Renee says:

    I lurk when I don’t have anything good to say…but normally even if it’s been said, I still say it. LOL!

    Renee’s last blog post..Stolen!

  4. Joanne says:

    No, I’m not a lurker. I’m to much of a big mouth for that! LOL

    Joanne’s last blog post..Transracial Adoption

  5. Erin says:

    I am a lurker for pretty much the same reasons as you. I don’t even remember how I came to your blog but your stories crack me up and are very interesting. I just keep coming back for more :)

    Erin’s last blog post..Valentine’s Day Date

  6. Elizabeth says:

    I usually say hi, but there are some blogs that I don’t know if I have commented yet…

    Elizabeth’s last blog post..All In A Day

  7. Krista says:

    I lurk when it’s a super popular blog and already has lots of commenters. Or if I read for the humor and don’t really have anything to add…
    I like to comment when people are asking for advice. Then I feel like it’s okay to give it!

    Krista’s last blog post..So Long, Farewell

  8. alice says:

    I used to. I think, maybe I do a little bit here and there. There’s a couple of blogs I read but don’t always comment on simply because I have nothing to say. I just enjoyed reading their post and had no comment on it. But I have commented at least once before.

    As for your blog, I comment only once in a while though I read from my feed whenever a new one pops up. I feel comfortable commenting here. It’s just an open and friendly place.

    alice’s last blog post..Back to who I was.

  9. grace says:

    If I want to say something, I just hit the comment and type away my thought, never looking at how many other comments were made before mine.

    grace’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #32

  10. Dee says:

    I’ve never considered myself a lurker, it sounds so beneath me! hehehehehehe! I like to consider myself a window shopper….lol Okay I’ll cut the crap ….I LURK….

    Dee’s last blog post..Happy Birthday Ariana

  11. Jacki says:

    I am both a commenter and a lurker. I ususally comment on blogs that get less than 50 comments, as any more than that and I really wonder if the person reads them all.

    Jacki’s last blog post..A Tutorial: How to Make Money on Craigslist

  12. Jennifer says:

    I wish I could comment through bloglines. I think I would not lurk as much if I did not have to actually load the page. Does that make sense. I realize I run through all my blogs that I love to read every day and don’t comment on half of them. Maybe its because I don’t have that much time.

    I think having to load, type in the spam word, etc. I just say never mind half the time.

    I know that if I don’t leave comments I prob won’t have people coming to my blog either. I am trying to do better though!!

    Jennifer’s last blog post..Good Mail

  13. Sparky Duck says:

    Naturally I lurk, usually cuz I am lazy

    Sparky Duck’s last blog post..Worth the Cost

  14. Vicki says:

    I guess I’m a lurker simply because I read a lot of blogs (yours included) through Bloglines and I don’t always “click through” to leave a comment.

    I’ve been told a lot of people visit my blog that way, too, which doesn’t really help the ego, does it? Low stats and low comments! ;)

    Vicki’s last blog post..Looking toward the sky, part 2

  15. Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says:

    I’m similar to the others – I try to comment as much as I can, but find that if it’s a blog that regularly gets 30+ comments on every post, that I don’t necessarily feel the need to add anything.

    Deb – Mom of 3 Girls’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday #32 – Daddy’s girl

  16. Tiffany says:

    I don’t purposefully lurk. I think it depends on the blog. Blogs that are really informal, I tend to go ahead and comment even if it is just to say that it made me laugh or that I agree.

    If it is a more formal blog (or if I think it is a more formal blog) I tend to just comment when I have somethings I really want to say that is pertinent.

    I usually comment at least once on a blog within a few weeks. If I have not found something that I really want to comment on, I have probably lost interest and stopped going back.

    Tiffany’s last blog post..WFMW- Managing Your Subscriptions

  17. Summer says:

    I’ve commented at least once on every blog I’ve ever looked at, I think.
    It’s funny Kailani, when I first found your blog I had just started blogging and I was astounded at all the comments you got and thought that there was no way you’d have time to get to know anyone new. But I commented anyway and when you came by and visited I was so excited. So I’m glad I commented.

    Summer’s last blog post..Can’t make up my mind

  18. Christina says:

    I lurk on some blogs – including yours! I just don’t have time to leave comments on everything I read.

    Christina’s last blog post..Thursday’s Theme – Texture

  19. melli says:

    I DO have a couple of blogs that I read regularly that I have not commented to. And I don’t comment on them for much the same reasons that you list… However… I know that eventually something will be said that I will NOT be able to keep silent about! LOL! Because that is the very nature of me! It actually happened on one of them just 2 days ago. I’d been reading that blog for several months – it’s a spiritual, inspirational blog — I just go to get “the message” from it… but the other day it just moved me sO much that I had no choice but to speak! (I did think twice about it though!) :)

    melli’s last blog post..Sticky Post … on comments…

  20. megan says:

    I’m usually a lurker an the *popular* sites. Like you said, If there is already 20 comments, I just keep going. But I try to put my two cents in when I have something to say.

  21. Qtpies7~ says:

    I have lurked, but I dont’ think I’ve ever been a follower of a blog and not left a comment at some point. I always try to leave a comment if a blog has new content. Every new blog I come to I try to leave a comment, unless I have nothing nice to say. ;-)
    I also always try to leave comments on newer blogs to encourage them.

    Great question!

    Qtpies7~’s last blog post..Praise!

  22. JewelsHud says:

    I don’t comment a lot – usually b/c I am one of few words – but I’m interested in finding out which blog you lurk on… HA!!

  23. Lulu says:

    I’ve been known to lurk, but I try to always comment. Although, there are time when I just don’t know what to say about the subject!

    Lulu’s last blog post..Mystery Theater Thursday: Who’s That Girl?

  24. Rach (Heart of Rachel) says:

    I’m not much of a lurker but there are times I visit a blog without saying hi … either because I’m in a hurry or I have nothing much to say at that moment.

    BTW, I have an award for you on my blog.

    Rach (Heart of Rachel)’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen : Recent Blogging Awards

  25. Desert Songbird says:

    *giggling at Sparky’s comment*

    Yes, I think everyone to some extent lurks here and there. Sometimes I lurk for the just the reason you said – I don’t feel comfortable commenting. Sometimes I lurk because I don’t want to comment; I merely want to spy. Other times, I just don’t have anything to say. There are lots of reasons to lurk. Even blogs where I regularly comment, at times I’ll lurk because the “conversation” that has ensued in the ongoing comment ramble has me lost.

    Desert Songbird’s last blog post..My Sorrows, They Learned to Swim

  26. witchypoo says:

    So not a lurker. And especially, I like to comment on newer blogs to encourage them. When someone comments on my blog, I go to theirs and see what’s what.

    witchypoo’s last blog post..It’s All About Him

  27. bee says:

    I’m bad to lurk.

    I don’t feel like I have anything to remotely intelligent or relevant to say about every post I read, so I get comment anxiety and just move along.

    I was also the girl who NEVER raised her hand in class. :-)

  28. Jen @ One Moms World says:

    It depends. I find I have a lot of lurkers on my blog, since looking at my stats and compared to comments left hehe! But if its a blog that I feel a loyal following too and I know they follow my blog, then definitely I’ll leave a comment as well.

    Jen @ One Moms World’s last blog post..Reflections On How Your Family Life Is

  29. Naomi says:

    I will comment if I feel like I have a point to make but most of the time I just read…

  30. TheAngelForever says:

    There are a dozen or so blogs that I regularly leave comments on. So many others are there that I look at daily, but honestly do not leave comments every time.

    As a blogger I know how sad and lonely it can be not to get comments on things at times. I too look at my stats and see a lot of people who get my feed, yet most days hardly any comments.

    It really is nice hearing from people and I think most of us are guilty of being silent lurkers a lot and need to come out of our shells a little more.

    TheAngelForever’s last blog post..Lunar Eclipse February 2008

  31. Blessed says:

    I lurk some – I do try to leave comments at least occasionally on all the blogs I visit, but sometimes I’ll go a few weeks without saying anything on some of them – I check yours out at least a couple of times a week – but I don’t comment all that often.

    Blessed’s last blog post..Ramblings of a Stressed-Out Work At Home Mom…

  32. Tammy says:

    I’m like you…I rarely lurk. Maybe because if I took enough time to read it, I might as well leave a comment! Plus, I know how I like comments…
    Yet, there are a couple blogs out there with huge followings that I rarely leave a comment with. I have left a couple…but it’s rare! For the same reasons…they just seem to get lost in the crowd!

    I personally like commenting on new blogs to encourage them (as a previous person just said) and of course there’s a group of blogger friends that I would never dream of just reading without commenting and saying hello!


    Tammy’s last blog post..A day with George and the Duggars

  33. Jessica K says:

    I’m not usually a lurker. I only read a few blogs, so the ones I read I try to comment on. There are days, though, when I just don’t have anything to say!

    Jessica K’s last blog post..Bloggy Lurve

  34. Rebecca says:

    There are some blogs I ‘lurk’ on, for many of the same reasons you’ve listed – already a lot of comments & I have pretty much the same things to say that has already been said. Sometimes I’ll put in a comment but not regularly.

    Rebecca’s last blog post..Sunday Scrappin’ #14

  35. Andrea says:

    I didn’t consider myself a lurker until I read what you said. Hee hee! Now I think I am a lot of the time. =)

    But.. Sometimes it takes me awhile to warm up if that’s what you want to call it, to start commenting. =) Sometimes I feel like such an odd ball to the regular comments on certain bloggers, or I don’t feel the same on a lot of issues that I don’t comment. Or.. I just don’t have time to comment… kiddo’s grabbing at me, etc. =)

  36. Holly Schwendiman says:

    So much of this is more about time for me. I don’t have as much time to leave comments as I used to but I still keep up reading with several blogs. I know what you’re describing though! It can be intimidating sometimes!


  37. Tara says:

    yep… I definitely lurk. If there is like 100 comments I am VERY unlikely to join in. I figure my input is not needed!

    Tara’s last blog post..Crazy 8’s

  38. Melissa Markham says:

    I am definitely not a lurker. If I find a blog that I thought looked neat, but then I am constantly finding nothing else that interests me enough to comment on, I delete that sucker from my feeds. There are too many blogs out there that make me want to grab a cup of coffee and chat for a spell for me to spend time with blogs that don’t move me. So if I find myself lurking, it is time to move on.

    Melissa Markham’s last blog post..Is A College Education The Way to A Successful Future?

  39. Sher :) says:

    I don’t really lurk. I think leaving comments is important. However, I must confess, if there are already a ton of comments, sometimes I do leave without commenting. :)

    Sher :) ’s last blog post..February Book Giveaway ~ I Love You More

  40. Kelly @ Love Well says:

    I’m like you, Kailani. I seldom visit a blog regularly without leaving a comment. I love the give-and-take!

    Kelly @ Love Well’s last blog post..Guess Where I Went Today For The First Time

  41. Sarah (Real Life) says:

    I usually don’t lurk, just because I have a big mouth! And I love comments, so I figure others do too. There are blogs that I feel intimidated on, though, through no fault of the blogger. For example Problogger, I comment there often, but everyone always seems so intellectual and, well…pro.

    I think you do a great job making readers feel welcome enough to share.

    Sarah (Real Life)’s last blog post..Social Studies for the 21st Century

  42. Jennifer says:

    Sometimes I only have time to hop around and read if I want to read all the blogs I like to visit everyday, I try to comment when I can but I can’t always at the time.
    And yes there are places that have LOTS of comments, more then I’ve ever seen at my place and I wonder if my comment will even be read so I won’t bother.

    Jennifer’s last blog post..I feel the need to broaden my horizons.

  43. donetta says:

    If I am real tired I just read, sometimes I don’t get to visit for days ,but then I like to say hello. I think it is very encouraging to both give and receive comments.
    Some days I will have over 60 visits and perhaps just one or two commenter’s.

    donetta’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday

  44. Jill says:

    I lurk on some blogs and comment on others. There really is no rhyme or reason as to why either…

    Jill’s last blog post..Not even close

  45. Melissa says:

    I’m weird :) I do lurk… I feel like the blogs that I visit are an emotional investment on some level… and so I lurk for awhile, make sure it’s a place where I’ll feel comfortable, then I will jump in. But, there are some blogs that I just enjoy reading and will probably never comment…

  46. Laura @ Laura Williams' Musings says:

    I lurk and post when either I have something to add or the post rings a bell with me so to speak.

    Laura @ Laura Williams’ Musings’s last blog post..Thursday Edition of Contests Galore

  47. Gloria says:

    I have to admit, I am a lurker…. mostly out of fear that I will say something dumb, or I have nothing to add to the comments that are already there.

    I started doing some commenting on blogs a couple weeks ago, until I commented on a site with a couple questions, you know the kind…. how do you do this…. it was something she was talking about doing…. and she commented me back rudely :(

    So that scared me back into my shell. Yours is the first post I have commented on since.

    Gloria’s last blog post..Peeves

  48. Kelly Rigby says:

    I read a lot of blogs. I guess as a new blogger that’s pretty common. I am an active commenter and an active lurker, and whether you get open and big mouth me or hiding in corners me depends on the content of the site, the number of comments and the general atmosphere.

    I read blogging sites for knowledge so I only rarely feel I have something to contribute, and sites like Problogger gets SO many comments it can feel silly to pop mine in too. And any site where people get aggressive or “know-it’all” over nothing I won’t comment most of the time because who needs the drama? I have enough of it with my 4 year old!

    As for island Life, I’m a relatively new reader but there is definitely a nice, friendly vibe here that makes me ramble on just like I’ve done.

    Glad to be a new member of the community.

    :) Kelly

    Kelly Rigby’s last blog post..25 Fast Facts About Women Around the World

  49. common mom says:

    I may lurk for a while, but for the most part if I feel it’s worth the time to actually read the blog, I might as well say something, too :-) Like you, some of the blogs are so big and have such a huge following, I don’t feel the need to comment. But if something really makes me laugh or think, or if the person just seems really friendly, I’ll go ahead and say something :-)

    I like your blog cuz it’s laid back and friendly . . . and has a sandy beach . . . I live in a land-locked state and LOVE Hawaii . . . ahhhhh, to get back there sometime :-) It’s been 6 years . . .

  50. Rosie says:

    Oh my goodness I’m response number 50! Do I lurk? No not at all, maybe I should. If I like a blog I always comment even if it’s only a brief hello. I enjoy commenting and I know how disappointing it is when I can see people have visited but no-one has left a comment. Makes me think I haven’t written anything worth commenting on so visitors have clicked off somewhere else. I don’t lurk I suppose because if I don’t like a blog much or don’t feel I can contribute I don’t go back.

    Rosie’s last blog post..Crazy child talk

  51. angie says:

    I almost always comment, but frequently wonder about the people who lurk on my blog. do they not comment because they don’t agree? Too busy? Just not interesting in taking the time? I think your blog is very new visitor friendly!

    angie’s last blog post..The thing about being a mommy………

  52. Jennifer H. says:

    I must admit, I’m a lurker. I do comment often, but I read so many blogs, I just don’t always have time to comment on every blog I’m reading. I guess I should start making time, huh?

    Jennifer :-)

    Jennifer H.’s last blog post..Flu-palooza

  53. Heather says:

    I try to comment more now than when I first stated blogging. But there are some blogs that I love to read but have never commented on for various reasons. Google reader makes it much easier to lurk! I have to remember to click over and comment too.

    I also wonder about people lurking on my blog. Why not comment?

    Heather’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday

  54. Kim says:

    I have to admit. I do my share of lurking, but I also comment. I guess I’m probaby half and half. I have a few blogs that I do a lot of commenting on and others that I comment on rarely or not at all. It just depends.

    Kim’s last blog post..Works For Me Wednesday – Easy Chicken Recipe

  55. Karen MEG says:

    I try to comment as much as I can… I used to be a lurker, but once I started commenting … well it’s been hard to shut me up! I love comments, so I try to reciprocate whenever possible.
    I’m finding it a challenge to keep up with all the blogs that I normally used to, now that working again (including yours, I’m not here as much as I’d like). So it would be nice to be able to comment through Reader.
    But yeah, like you, if someone already gets over 50 comments, you wonder whether the blogger will get through to them all, especially if I don’t have a whole heck of a lot to add to the conversation.

    Karen MEG’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen

  56. Melissa says:

    I almost didnt even post on this! I too feel if there are too many comments mine will get lost in the shuffle! Love your blog, lurk here every day! Ha ha!

    Melissa’s last blog post..PoiWear Giveaway ! !

  57. pickel says:

    I lurk all the time because I do research online. A lot of the time I link back but sometimes it is just to gather information. Many times people can see that I have visited, though.

    pickel’s last blog post..The Misunderstood Child

  58. diana/sunshine says:

    ok, i’m a lurker at times. and mostly for the reason you gave – feeling like an outsider or getting lost in a large crowd.

    diana/sunshine’s last blog post..quirky quote

  59. Pamela says:

    perhaps because of my “age”… I always feel odd when I don’t leave a “calling card”

    But, I’m changing that and only commenting on posts when I don’t have to dig something out of a hat to say.

    So, I guess I’m learning 2 lurk.

  60. Lucy says:

    Well, I’m comment 60 on this one – that is a lot! – and often whatever I wanted to say has already been covered. Not just here, but on many sites.

    Partly that’s because of the time differences across the world …

  61. Jen says:

    Most of the ones I read regularly I comment on when I feel the urge. There are one or two or maybe three that I read that I enjoy hearing what they have to say, but I don’t feel like I want to get in on the discussion. You blog has always felt “homey” since I started reading it! :-)

    Jen’s last blog post..Love my Bizzi2Go Planner?You can have one too!

  62. Ginny says:

    At this point, I read so many that there is no way I could comment on them. I do try to comment as much as possible though. I notice that I don’t usually comment on the really big blogs.

    Ginny’s last blog post..13 Things you should be doing for your health

  63. Wendy says:

    Hi, my name is Wendy, and I’m a lurker.

    There, I’ve admitted it. That’s half the battle, right?

    I try to comment on most of the blogs I read, but a lot of times I don’t get a chance to think of anything worthwhile to say before my children start demanding my attention again, so I run out of time. :(

    Wendy’s last blog post..Speaking Of Time…

  64. Angela says:

    I know just what you mean…I am typically not a lurker, but there are a couple of blogs on my list of favorites that I just don’t feel comfortable commenting on. For me, I think it’s a combination of what you suggested. Although, sometimes it has to do with the reception of my comments…if I don’t get a reply (something as simple as a “Thanks for stopping by”,) then I start to wonder if the blogger didn’t appreciate my comments, or worse, thinks I’m an idiot. In that case, I either flee the blog never to return again, or I do what everyone else does…I lurk.

    By the way, you’re always great about receiving (and returning) comments…which is why I’m not a lurker on your Island!

    Angela’s last blog post..Robinson Weekly Update

  65. tiggerprr says:

    Hey girl! :)

    I lurk sometimes, if I don’t have time to comment but still want to visit. Or I’ll lurk if I don’t have anything to add…

    I don’t find myself being too bashful to comment on a “popular site”. If I have something to say…I’mma gonna say it. :)

    tiggerprr’s last blog post..Oh yeah?.and?

  66. Daisy says:

    I’ve lurked occasionally, usually on blogs that get so many comments I feel mine are useless. I like to comment on my favorites, especially those who don’t get many comments. Validation comes as much from comments as from the stat counter. Really.

    Daisy’s last blog post..Fur Elise is not for amateurs

  67. margalit says:

    It’s not in my nature to lurk for long. I’m just too opinionated and too chatty. But I do lurk on a few blogs, not because I don’t have anything to say, because I do. I lurk because I don’t particularly LIKE anything the blogger has to say, but I read it for morbid curiosity. It’s like a trainwreck online, and for some reason I just like to read a couple of these blogs for pure entertainment. I couldn’t say a think that didn’t sound snarky, so I don’t comment. But it’s only a very few blogs.

    margalit’s last blog post..Not only bad, I’m also a space cadet

  68. Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah says:

    I lurk sometimes, but it usually isn’t on purpose. I just read so many blogs that it would be impossible to comment on every one.

    Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah’s last blog post..Another Reason Everybody Should Have Married Gabe

  69. Michelle in Mx says:

    I lurk
    two things affect me most
    *if they comment on my blog
    *if their comments are more than . . say . . 69
    Really though, if there is more than 20 comments I’ll only comment if I have anything different, new or strongly felt. It’s not too often. Pretty sad when my whole feeling about some post can be summed up in “ditto”

    Michelle in Mx’s last blog post..A bit over stated . . .

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